There is ALWAYS a Solution

I spend my working mom hours as a fundraising consultant.  As a fifteen year veteran of the industry, I have seen almost everything there is to see in fundraising. 

Often we are brought in as consultants because clients are stuck and cannot see past their own way of doing things.  At many places there is only one route from here to there and that is how it has been done for decades. 

When clients are feeling stuck and down and overwhelmed - I share my favorite phrase:

 

"There is always a solution."

When I first began using it my reason was to create a pause in the conversation and redirect the discussion.  Over the years it has become the phrase I go back to when either a client or I cannot seem to get out of our own way to find a route to solve a problem.

Another way to think about it was in my Pinterest feed a week or so ago: 

If you don't like where you are, then change it.  You are not a tree.

It is funny to me how much work and home can bleed together.  This "work" phrase has slowly become a very strong mantra for me. 

Over the years, as I have battled with depression and anxiety, I have found this simple concept to be the most helpful in seeing out from the deep well of sadness.  There are millions of phrases and mantras and advice for those dealing with mental health issues.  Countless plans and therapists and books and well meaning friends who tell you EXACTLY what will make you better.  OR make you feel like this is not "real" and you just need to pick yourself up by your bootstraps and GET OVER IT.

But when you are THAT low, there is no moving or changing or hope. 

When you feel that disconnected, a plan that stretches for months seems just to big to grapple with.

When you are that lonely, there is no one who understands your pain.

For me, once I was able to find word or a phrase or a sliver of light, there was a path to hope. 

I happen to love the idea of solutions because the deep power of internal darkness causes you to see only the sadness.  Solution based thinking allows small steps toward change and happiness. 

For me, the solution was small: just for today, I will find the good in front of me.

And it grew: just for today, I will tell my story honestly to those around me and not worry so much about being judged.

And grew: just for today, I will embrace my running shoes as friends and set a goal - a BIG one.

And grew: just for today, I will love my husband and son with my whole heart.  I will actually rely on them.  I will be present. 

And here I am.  I feel stronger and better and full of light again.  I know my old friend depression may resurface at any moment.  But I also know there is always a solution.

xo friends...