Is that a good idea or a bad idea?

 

When John and I were looking at homes four years ago we were in search of a good lot with a good size home in a nice neighborhood with good schools.  In July of 2009, we closed on just that.  We LOVE LOVE LOVE our house and our neighborhood.  It's in a beautiful planned community with walking paths and real trees and wonderful neighbors.
 
One of the things we didn't consider, or at least I didn't, was what that kind of neighborhood meant in terms of STUFF and labels and keeping up with the neighbors.  I don't find our immediate neighbors very competitive, but I watch the local teenagers with new cars and labels on their arms and I know what's coming. 

I grew up in a beautiful neighborhood much like this one.  My first introduction to labels came at 11.  When Harry Potter was learning about Hogwarts, I was learning about Champion and Keds and Z Cavaricci (you may have to have grown up in NJ to know about the last one). 
 
The NEED for stuff traveled with me to college in Milwaukee where the labels were different, but consumption became a larger part of my life with the freedom that comes from your own credit card. (Why 18 year-olds who do not even know how to balance a check book should NOT be given credit cards is a whole other blog post!)  By the time I was finished with college, I had racked up $10,000 in debt trying to keep up.  That pattern persisted for years and the need to have what everyone else had, or to fill a need I thought was there with STUFF got me in lots of trouble. 
 
Over the past year or so, I have begun to shift my thinking about consumption and consumer need.  I don't want to live in a way that purchasing items is more important than real moments.  I don't want M to live that way.  We do not need to walk out of Target with $100 worth of STUFF every time we go in there. 
 

 
But it is so hard.  We are inundated by emails and Facebook ads and reminders of those items we MUST HAVE all day long. And that is before being invited to the at home purse/ chef/ clothing/ jewelry parties or seeing the new must have toy at the park. 

I've realized, since beginning to become a conscious consumer, that it is not about avoiding these messages.  It's about shifting my thinking about them.  I need to pay attention and work to change every day.  Sometimes every hour.  And sometimes every minute.  My choices need to be just that - choices. 
 
I ask M when he is about to jump off a table or climb the pantry shelves - "Is that a good idea or a bad idea?".  (He typically answers "good idea", but again - another post.) For the first time, I am now asking myself the same question when faced with consumer choices.  It feels strange, but good.  
 
xo friends...